The Mystery of the Exploding Girl
I can’t think of anything to write about tonight so I am just going to start writing and see if anything comes out of my head in opposition to my writer’s block. Maybe I should simply describe the above photo. I took this shot back in 2005. It was a late winter evening, and I was finishing up an afternoon of deer stalking. Now, I’m no hunter, but the act of stalking and photographing a deer is fun for me. Such curious creatures, I doubt they feel my... Read More
I remember this
You’ll know if this makes sense to you: “And it starts, sometime around midnight. Or at least that’s when you lose yourself for a minute or two. As you stand, under the bar lights. And the band plays some song about forgetting yourself for a while. And the piano’s this melancholy soundtrack to her smile. And that white dress she’s wearing you haven’t seen her for a while. “But you know, that she’s watching. She’s laughing, she’s turning. She’s... Read More
Falling for you
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH! How many of you read that and thought, “He’s saying, ‘ahhh,’ like he’s satisfied with something…oh wait, the r’s and g’s and more h’s to indicate that he’s frustrated or angry. Here we go again. (roll eyes now)” So, massive apology to the world for my basic mood lately. I’ve been stressed at work a lot. Ever hear the expression, you can’t fit 100... Read More
Potential
The ink drops to the page, ridged blackness like an inverted star its potential swimming within the fluid. I stab it with my finger and drag out its life into a box within which I fill everything that fills me. A lifetime of fear and happiness, love lost and gained, pain and pleasure fills the box like a map with no legend. Others look upon it with trepidation and confusion as I try to align the contours to true north. My divining rod was a thought of wholly perfect potential.... Read More
All these things that I’ve done
Tomorrow is my birthday. Thirty-six. Alla, the girl who cuts my hair, says I’m just a baby though an increasing percentage of the clipped hair falling from her scissors is silver. She’s getting married for the second time now at forty-five and I’ve never seen her happier. She insists that people who get married before they are forty are nuts. She did it and she thinks of herself as nuts. People just change too much during that transitional era between twenty... Read More
Rosary of thought unread aloud
It’s a rosary of thought, it’s over and over, and it runs through my head from bead to bead. It doesn’t matter. Like a fight with myself. You know, eventually, I’m going to win. So I wait for the victory. I close my eyes and wait for the victory to come at last. It DOESN’T matter, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter. I pretend it doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter. Cuz it doesn’t,... Read More
Ten Minute Lunch
Today I spent ten minutes eating my lunch on the rickety wire furniture adrift in the shadow of a building. These autumn days chill shadowed areas to blue, but I was not shivering because of the cold and the shadow was cast not by the sun, but by the presence of my former love inside. Part of me feels resentful that my ex girlfriend now works in the same small town that I do. Part of me loves it. Part of me wants to tell her to get lost and give me back my town. ... Read More
Metrics
Some people I work with don’t care about anything other than successful numbers. As someone involved in creating artwork for a living, it’s difficult to mesh with that metrics-based world. But I do keep track of almost everything I do at work so just for fun, here are some of my numbers from the past 14 days (since Sept 19th): PHOTO RESEARCH: 7 requests filled (way down – I usually get 3+ a day) PHOTO SHOOTS: 18 PHOTOS SHOT: 11 GB VIDEO SHOOTS: 4 HOURS WORKED:... Read More
